Where have all the MEN gone?
When I think about men, I think about those who have impacted my life most. I think of strength, protection, rationality and safety. I think of one half of the whole. That is what my step-father was for me and my mom growing up in a blended family of six. That is what my husband has been for me and the kids over our 20+ years of marriage. Those are the strengths I see in my 17-year old son as he follows the model of his father, grandfathers and church youth leaders.
I grew up with two dads, one biological and one step. They are very different people from very different upbringings, and I respect each of them for very different reasons. But it took me having a son of my own to fully appreciate the boy within every man. And that is the beauty of families. Life comes full circle within its multi-generational experience.
I do not believe masculinity is toxic
I believe masculinity is critically important, not only for men but also for women and children. In my lifetime alone though I have seen men become more feminine. I have seen exclusively boy programs begin to include girls, like with Boy Scouts of America, while at the same time I have seen traditionally co-ed programs begin to exclude boys and become all-girl. Our local mountain biking program comes to mind, Little Bella’s, but it is only one of many girl-empowered programs without a comparable boy option.
It could be I believe in the power of masculinity because I am not afraid of men. I have not been hurt by men the way some women have been hurt by men. I rather like men, and I think every institution needs them whether it be work, education, or family. Why is it that, as women have become more powerful leaders men have shrunk back into administration? I say this with the make-up of our school district in mind. The addition of School Board Member, Eric Tessmer in 2022 to what had previously been an all woman board and Superintendent, has facilitated a more sound and rational discussion. It has been nice to see.
Modern feminists have spun the tale that men and women are the same, that women don’t need men in their lives, and that hypermasculinity is a violent threat to women and children. That is simply not true. In fact, I attribute the saying “Be a Man” to feminists who today demand this of a WOMEN.
FLASH: Sexual health education, 3rd edition -Grades 6-8 & 9-12
Gender Inclusive Curriculum for SoWashCo Schools (out of King County, Washington)
“Undoing Gender Stereotypes is the foundation for FLASH’s sexual violence prevention lessons. This lesson strives to prevent perpetration of sexual assault by addressing the risk factors for perpetration identified by the CDC: hypermasculinity; societal norms that support male superiority and sexual entitlement; and societal norms that maintain women’s inferiority and sexual submissiveness. The lesson allows students to uncover the unhealthy consequences of rigid gender norms and to develop health-enhancing alternatives.”
In The Subordination of Order I talked about falling rain as a metaphor to describe the evil that surrounds us, and I illustrated how the strong nuclear family covers and protects children from drowning in the falling rain. There are so many ways for rain to get in under the family umbrella, and when I read through South Washington County’s sexual health education curriculum, this crack has become too large to neglect any longer. I will go into greater discussion about this in June.
The entire natural world exemplifies this same umbrella of protection and care. The female Eagle tends to her nest and sits on her eggs. She is over them, protecting her babies with her body and her wings. The male Eagle tends to her needs and takes care of her surroundings. He is over her and the children, positioning himself between his family and the outside world.
This is what it is like to live under the umbrella of natural order. Each gender has a roll to play, because without order all are vulnerable to the falling rain.
Imagine removing the father from this equation.
That would result in extinction of the species, and yet removing the father is exactly what the Welfare State is doing. That is what the LGBT movement is doing. That is what Social Emotional Learning (SEL) through the Lense of Equity is doing. That is what SoWashCo Schools’ Gender Inclusive Sexual Health Education Curriculum is doing.
You may be think I am exaggerating, but I am not.
“According to the CDC, children from fatherless homes account for : 63% of youth suicides, 90% of all homeless and runaways, 85% of children who exhibit behavioral disorders, 71% of high school dropouts, and 75% of rapists.”
(A TakeCharge Survey -The Washington Perspective, Spring 2023, pg 5)
In SoWashCo School, the student population includes 6% English Learners, 25.7% who receive Free/Reduced-Priced Lunch, 18% Special Ed, and .6% homeless. These are the highest at-risk students among us.
DEI and equity programs methodically deliberate over the literacy and math achievement gaps across all learning styles and seven demographic categories – All, Hispanic, Black, Two or more races, Asian, and White. We know the students who are school ready, who take advanced courses, who are suspended, and who graduate. We survey the kids who feel anxious or depressed, who identify as a girl, who identify as a boy, who identify as Native American, etc.
What we really should be asking is
How many children enrolled in SoWashCo Schools live without a father in the home?
TakeCharge is a Minnesota based company who is asking this very question about fatherless homes and the negative impact they have on children, women and men.
Kendall and Sheila Qualls are focused on restoring the traditional nuclear Black family, and they have been sharing some pretty alarming statistics. (See website HERE)
Kendall A. Qualls, President of TakeCharge
“Policy Not Privilege Created Today’s Disparities. The woke left built a ponzi scheme in public education that has bankrupted the Black community financially, morally, and academically … When Martin Luther King, Jr. was assassinated in 1968, nearly 80% of Black children were born into two-parent families. Today, nearly 80% of Black children are born into fatherless homes.”
The Washington Perspective (Spring 2023), Missing Pieces, pg 15 -originally published in The Federalist
In The Washington Perspective (Spring 2023), TakeCharge walks us through a timeline of Black American history after the Civil War. “1964 – Lindon B. Johnson’s Great Society launches SOCIAL WELFARE PROGRAM Aid to Families With Dependent Children (AFDC), which was heavily marketed in urban Black communities. First time federal government financially incentivizes women to have children outside of marriage. Black marriage rate declines as out-of-wedlock births increase.” (The Timeline Progressive Liberals Do Not Want Exposed, pg 7)
“Today, over 50% of births occur outside of marriage for all women under the age of 30. This is the largest percentage of any county worldwide. Raising children in a marriage is the best way to reduce poverty, combat inequality, and develop socially productive children. Government agencies should incentivize marriage … ”
The Washington Perspective (Spring 2023), About TakeCharge, pg 9
Incentivize that which leads in the direction you want to go.
The natural order of the world works, and it also works for state, law and family.
In MOUNTAIN BIKING look at the path, not the tree. In SOCCER look at the net not the bar. In LITERATURE look at the over comer, not the oppressor. In SICKNESS look to the cure, not to defeat. In POVERTY look up, not down. In LIFE look forward, not back. In DARKNESS look to the light, not the dark. In FAITH look for life in Jesus, not death.
Our current government leans Progressive, and they are incentivizing single-parent families, sex outside of marriage, promiscuity, abortion, and a gender fluid lifestyle. If political leaders are incentivizing that which leads in the direction THEY want us to go, then what direction do the American people think is in store for themselves?
Because it is not to WIN or stay on the PATH or hit the NET or OVER COME adversity or be CURED or look UP, FORWARD, into the LIGHT, or for life in JESUS CHRIST.
If UP is down and DOWN is up, what is RIGHT?
It is the female who dominates today.
And from where I stand, it is the female I see who controls, gossips, manipulates, and seduces. I warn my son about women as much as I warn my daughter about men. Powerful women and weak men are detrimental to families, religion, and society as a whole. It is an upside down pyramid that can only exist in a protected bubble like America. We have no idea the harsh realities that exist outside this superficial microcosm of inconsequential “problems” we create for ourselves everyday in America. Our public education system needs to do a better job of teaching children about the REAL problems that face people in 3rd world countries.
And yet it is also the female who suffers.
The irony of the feminist movement is that in their success at “liberating” girls from the bondage of their own bodies, young women are suffering at higher levels of anxiety and depression than ever before. The feminists have created a culture of hypermasculine WOMEN who are expected to be all things to all people in all situations at all times.
This is a lonely endeavor for the young woman because she is made to feel like she has to become WHOLE all by herself. The truth is that, if given the opportunity, a MAN can be the half that makes her WHOLE. There is no weakness in that! There is STRENGTH! Together, a man and a woman are MUCH stronger than they are alone.
“In 2021, nearly 30% of female students drank alcohol during the past 30 days. Almost 20% of female students experienced sexual violence by anyone during the past year and 14% had ever been physically forced to have sex. Although these numbers are high, the rates of poor mental health and suicidal thoughts and behaviors are even higher. In 2021, almost 60% of female students experienced persistent feelings of sadness or hopelessness during the past year and nearly 25% made a suicide plan.”
Centers for Disease Control 2011-2021 Youth Risk Behavior Survey Data Summary and Trends Report (Link HERE)
At the top of the article, I included a quote from the FLASH sexual health education used in District 833. They reference the CDC in their rational for the sexual violence prevention lessons. According to the Youth Risk Behavior Summary, which is also a CDC Report, girls are worse off now than they were before. Why? I can tell you why…. Because this curriculum is grooming pubescent children into thoughts about sex that they would not have had without this curriculum.
“LGBTQ youth experience worse sexual health outcomes than their heterosexual peers, including higher rates of pregnancy, STD’s and sexual violence.”
High School FLASH – Lesson 4, sexual orientation and gender identity
After spending over 6 hours inside a closed room of the district service center reviewing the FLASH curriculum (under close supervision might I add), I am very sad to see this report by the CDC, but I am not surprised. After reading what I have read, it is easy to see that many girls who are subjected to this curriculum will choose one of two directions …
- She will be frighten by males because of the graphic experience she has now had with a male body part. This will then lead her to preferring female companionship over males
- She will be encouraged into promiscuous experimentation with boys and girls at a very young age and outside of marriage. The lessons in FLASH normalize sex and vilifies anyone who does not accept a gender inclusive norm.
BOTH end in VIOLENCE, according to FLASH’s own proclamation.
When are American voters and Minnesotans and District 833’s residents going to realize that feminists have done more to hurt women than to the help them. A weak America is a vulnerable America, and weak nations cannot help others if they cannot help themselves. Men and boys are NOT the enemy. Christians are NOT the enemy.
You don’t have to be a Christian to believe there is a natural order to the world.
In The Abolition of Man, C.S. Lewis explains the objective reality of nature through the Tao of sentiment.
“Nearly all religions and philosophical schools, whether Judaism, Christianity, Hinduism, Aristotelianism, Stoicism, or Platonism, Lewis observes, posit that there is an underlying natural order to the world, and Truth is that which most clearly reflects and explains this reality. To uphold this “doctrine of objective value” is to believe that “certain attitudes are really true, and others really false, to the kind of thing the universe is and the kind of things we are.” -Brett and Kate McKay in Men Without Chests (Link HERE)
We Are A Nation Off Balance
I understand that this structure of subordination between a man and a woman is not the mainstream narrative. It directly contradicts the feminists who wrongly proclaim that in the presence of male dominance there MUST be a female victim.
My argument is this: The mainstream narrative is a lie. There is CHAOS and vulnerability in the family who lives in an upside down pyramid where kids are above mom, mom is above dad, and dad is above God.
The masculine and the feminine can exist as opposite, complimentary partners – equal in their balance with one another. Let’s nurture that! The family unit of Father, Mother and Child is a stronger institution than any form of government. There is strength in the union they create together. If there was not, then past oppressors would not have used the separation of family units as a control to weaken the resolve of people (ie. American slaves and Jewish concentration camps)
In Narrative of the Life of Frederick Douglass, an American Slave, he talks about the double relation of master and father to the plantation slave, the use of slave women for sexual pleasure, and the separation of the slave mother from her child for profitability. He also talks about the lure of alcohol used by slave masters to keep slave men in line – weak and under control.
Therefore whosoever heareth these sayings of mine, and doeth them, I will liken him unto a wise man, which built his house upon a rock: And the rain descended, and the floods came, and the winds blew, and beat upon that house; and it fell not: for it was founded upon a rock. And every one that heareth these sayings of mine, and doeth them not, shall be likened unto a foolish man, which built his house upon the sand: And the rain descended, and the floods came, and the winds blew, and beat upon that house; and it fell: and great was the fall of it.
Matthew 7:24-27
Coming up in June …
District 833’s Policy 525 Violence Prevention – IV. PREVENTION STRATEGIES – Line R. reads, “Develop curriculum on child sexual abuse prevention for students, including age- appropriate instruction on recognizing sexual abuse and assault, boundary violations, and ways offenders groom or desensitize victims, as well as strategies to promote disclosure, reduce self-blame, and mobilize bystanders…”
When I read this, I wondered how District 833 defined offenders, groomers and victims. So I asked to see the curriculum, and I was disturbed to read within the district’s violence prevention a form of grooming in itself. A small section of the FLASH sexual health education curriculum is quoted at the intro, but there is a lot more where that came from.
This is such an important message. Removing MEN from society hurts everyone including women.
Our kids should not be sexualized.
Our boys should be raised to be men. Our girls should be raise to be women. Our kids should be taught to raise strong families with complimentary roles under God. A cord of three strands is not easily broken. God, husband, wife.
Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 Thank you for reminding me about this verse, Brian … “complimentary roles under God” is right on.